One time, though, instead of hurling epithets, she simply started to sing a little song, like she always did when she didn't want to just spell things out and make things easy for me - "That's for troglodytes," she would say.
Soy un egoísta, soy un infeliz
Y no me importa nadie mas que yo.
Soy maravilloso, soy encantador
Y no sé por qué yo nunca soy tu centro de atracción.
Soy un presumido, soy un ganador,
Soy lo que le falta al mundo para ser mejor.
No comparto no convido, no presto no invito,
Que no entiendes lo que digo...
No tengo amigos...
No tengo amigos...
Y nadie quiere estar conmigo.
Pregunta lo que quieras, yo te responderé.
Yo nunca me equivoco, porque todo yo lo sé.
Y yo soy superior, y yo lo tengo todo,
Y con todo lo que tengo a mi lado estarás.
No comparto no convido, no presto no invito,
Que no entiendes lo que digo...
I'm selfish, I'm unhappy
And I don't care about anyone more than myself
I'm wonderful, I'm enchanting
I don't know why I'm never in the middle of your fun
I'm a poser, a user
I'm what the world needs to become better
I don't share, invite, loan, or treat
I hope you don't understand what I'm saying
I have no friends
I have no friends
And nobody wants to be with me
Ask whatever you want, I will respond
I'm never wrong, I know everything.
And I'm better, I have everything
And with all that I have you will be by my side
I don't share, invite, loan, or treat
I hope you don't understand what I'm saying...
And then she stuck out her grisly tongue and stomped home. Well, that's nothing compared to those god-awful ranchera songs she would sing in the shower sometimes! No more drama queens for me. I'm looking for the girl-next-door who can communicate plainly in English or French, who'll watch one of my animations and simply say "You're awesome, Mehdi! Please fuck me." No more going off on tangents about Ptolemy and zoetropes and The Sinking of the Lusitania. I'm sure life will be much easier with a nice chick. I'd be much happier. Now if only one of them would answer my IMs on myspace!
